


Just a walk on the woods.

by samgreenstorm



Category: My Engineer (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst with a Happy Ending, I'm part of the Give Bohn a hug squad, Light Angst, M/M, Protect Bohn, The pairings are there and have some scenes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-19
Updated: 2020-05-19
Packaged: 2021-03-02 22:21:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,701
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24274252
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/samgreenstorm/pseuds/samgreenstorm
Summary: Bohn has just been on the saddest bus trip of his life, seeing his friends happy and in love while his boyfriend ignores him is not what one would call a happy journey.Now he knows he needs some time to think about him and Duen and what he is doing with himself.(After 1x 12)
Relationships: Bohn/Happiness, King/Ram (My Engineer), Mek /Boss, Thara / Frong - Relationship
Comments: 17
Kudos: 200





	Just a walk on the woods.

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [You're not alone in this](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24233611) by [Morathi_Cain](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Morathi_Cain/pseuds/Morathi_Cain). 



> I really needed to write this, no matter the angst because Bohn deserves a lot of hugs after the last episode. And honestly while I love My Engineer, Bohn and Duen have a lot of problems. After reading Morathi_ Cain this was born.

Bohn takes a deep breath. 

He pinches the bridge of his nose, he is so exhausted. 

His eyes dart around his friends, he sees Mek and Boss flirting with each other, they are holding hands as Boss tries to feed Mek, who looks at him with a wide smile on his face. He has been talking more lately and he seems happier too. 

A little grin shows at his face, remembering how his two friends told them how they were actually dating now not that the fact that Mek had his arm around Boss and was smiling as happily as he has ever seen his friend, was clue enough, he thinks.

The exchanged looks between him and King were accompanied with cash. Damn it! He thought they would have done it earlier, his friends are really not as conspicuous as they believed. 

He couldn’t help but feel a pang of jealousy looking at them, of their friendship, of the easiness of their touches, of the whispered love words. Oh.. how much he wanted that. 

The fact that his brain went to Duen was not a surprise, it had done that since the first moment he saw him. His mind conjuring the same images but with him and Duen instead. His cheeks felt warm but his heart didn't. He knew he would be expecting too much of Duen, the boy doesn’t even let him touch him let alone be this lovey dovey in public or in private if he was honest with himself, something he was trying not to be more and more lately. 

He shook his head, no time for having those thoughts, he was happy for his friends so he laughed at them, he teased them and congratulate them.

His trip to memory lane is interrupted when he hears King laughing his ass off, the cause was Ram sitting next to him eating an ice cream even if there was more ice cream on his face than in the waffle cone. King was chuckling as he was pointing to Ram’s face, their junior couldn’t stop looking at his friend, it was such a soft look that Bohn felt he was intruding. 

Maybe he was. 

King has been acting a bit weird lately, more quiet, more pensive, he is also helping their juniors. It is not strange for him to act this way but then his eyes have been going more to Duen’s friend as of lately. He has also had more excuses not to hang out with them, saying he was busy, the motive sitting in front of King now. Bohn wouldn’t say anything because despite the absent mindedness of his best friend, he can see also how much cheerful and content he has been. Bohn has learnt that you can’t pull things out from King you have to wait for him to tell you, he thinks it won’t be long now. 

A boy like Ram was not someone he had ever thought King would end up with, but seeing them together, he can’t help but think of how wrong he was.

The little he knows of Ram is from their fights and from the occasional remark that Duen gives, Ram is an actual good guy. Bohn knows he is protective, maybe a little too overprotective of his friends but then so is he and it is because he really cares for them. 

But then Ram is also the quiet type, he has heard from his classmates that the boy barely talks, he knows from Duen that Ram only talks when he feels comfortable and watching King and Ram sitting so close together, he seems to be comfortable around King.

There is something about the way their eyes meet, Bohn thinks, it seems as if they’re having whole conversations with just a look. They must have spent more time than he thought in each other’s company.

Bohn’s heart feels like someone is squeezing it hard so he stops looking, deciding instead to go for a walk around the place they’re staying, to the surrounding woods. 

As he walks he wonders if Duen would notice that he is gone. Probably not, he seemed to be content enough taking pictures of everything as soon as they got out of the bus and then talking to his friends and forgetting Bohn even exists and he is so tired of following him like a lap dog. 

Being around Duen is making him grumpier and making him show the bad side of his personality. He has been so jealous and possessive of him. He isn’t like that, while is true that he has been something of a bastard to his previous girlfriends he has never acted like this. 

That has made him so frustrated with himself and confused. The feelings that he has for Duen are new for him, wanting to be so close to someone, wanting to hugged him, to touch him all the time, just to feel him near. 

He wants Duen’s attention and affection so bad, he wants it to be freely given but instead he fights for it over and over again. And Duen denies him and denies him. There has been more affection or care when they weren’t dating. If so. 

Does Duen just not feel the same way he does? Does he not want to have all of Bohn’s attention? 

Bohn remembers all those times when he has tried to offer something of himself to him and how has Duen ignored him. How whenever he tried to touch Duen, Duen pulls away how his touches are always one way. How he only seems to be able to touch him is when the other is asleep.

It hurts, his breathing slows down and he knows that any moment now, the tears will spill out. 

Loud steps and two known voices draw his attention for a moment, as the voices get closer, he recognizes Frong and Thara. Thara stops and squats down to point to something excitedly, Bohn can’t see it from where he is sitting but he does see the small smile on Frong’s face and how Thara is holding Frong’s wrist delicately.

Frong doesn’t pull away.

Thara stands up and together their steps disappear. 

Bohn’s tears finally spill then the sobs come, his breathing quickens and he feels like he can’t breathe. 

He hopes that Thara and Frong are far enough not to have heard him, even when a part of him despite the embarrassment hopes they did, that they would warn Duen, that Duen would come, that Duen would give him a hug and take his worries away. 

It’s the thought that that wouldn’t happen that makes him cry harder.

What is the use of having a boyfriend and believing his feelings are reciprocated when it doesn’t feel like that?

He sees Duen being nice to everyone else but the moment Bohn gets close, he gets scared or goes away.

Does Duen not realize that this hurts him? That the reason he gets possessive and jealous is precisely that. 

There have been so many red flags that he has been actively ignoring because he wanted to be with Duen in any way possible, actions that have been hurting and that he can’t stand any longer, the bus trip and seeing his friends so happy and in love has been the last straw for him.

Even Frong and Thara seemed to be happier with each other than he was with Duen. 

Bohn knows what he has to do even if it is painful. 

He cries again, hiding his face between his arms, looking down, he doesn’t know for how long.

“Bohn!”

“Bohn! Where are you!” Another voice screams.

The yelling is loud enough that he is able to hear it despite his wails. 

Soon enough, he can feel a couple of arms around him. It is a familiar warmth.

“We found you!” Boss says on his ear. He is the one who is hugging him.  
King’s recognizable hand gives him a handkerchief. Bohn takes it and tries to breathe normally again and uses it to clean the wetness from his face. 

“What happened?” Mek asks sitting behind Boss.

“Yeah, We saw you leaving your things at the room and then you were gone.” King chimes in.

“Man, you have been gone for hours, we were worried.” Tee rests a hand on his shoulders.

He feels the need to cry again, he presses his lips together and rubs a hand through his face. 

Bohn loves his friends.

“ I‘m going to break up with Duen.” Bohn finally says. The words despite the ache also make him feel liberated. 

His friends are exchanging concerning looks.

“What happened? Did you guys fight again?” Tee gets a murderous gaze from the rest of his friends at the question.

Bohn shakes his head.

“It’s not working. We seem to want different things, I want to be close to him and Duen just wants to be left alone.” He struggles to say.

“Bohn…” Boss breaks away their embrace to be replaced by King. “I’m sorry.” 

On his other side, Mek covers his shoulder with his arm.

“ Is that what all the fighting was about?” Boss asks now holding hands with his boyfriend.

He nods. ” I guess, I just I’m tired of trying to touch him and him pulling away, of trying to open up to him so he knows me better and him not caring. I’m exhausted of being jealous of everyone because my boyfriend ignores me but is nice to everyone else. I want to be with someone who cares about me, who is comfortable around me, who lets me be close to them. Is that too much to ask?” He looks at his friends, who shake their heads.

“It’s not.” Mek adds.

“I don’t wanna be stupidly jealous or angry anymore.” 

“We didn’t know it was this bad, dude.” Tee admits guiltily. 

A sarcastic laugh almost escapes him.

“ I was still holding on to some type of hope, I guess. I thought I could make it work. That it didn't matter if it was only me.”

“A relationship needs more than one person. One alone can’t make it work.” King argues softly.

“You know you have us, right? To whatever you need. Except a few things, I have a boyfriend now. Sorry, Bohn. “ Boss says tilting his head. Mek smiles at Boss sweetly.

The envy he felt before has decreased, his happiness for them winning inside of him.

“I know. Thank you.” Bohn feels strong enough to stand up now.

His friends stand up with him.

“When are you going to do it?” Mek asks worried as they walk back to the place they‘re staying.

Bohn thinks about it, on one hand he wants to do it as soon as possible but another part of him doesn’t want to put Duen in that position during the trip.

Seeing as Duen doesn’t care much whether he is close to him or not, he can just be with his friends during the trip and talk to Duen when they’re back in Bangkok.

“ I’ll do it after the trip. It’s not like he is gonna notice if I’m with you guys more.” Bohn says casually shrugging his shoulders.

“Bohn…” His best friend laments.

He pats his hand and gives him a nod and a little smile. 

It’s okay.

His friends talk of the exciting things they can do on this trip, most probably to cheer him up, which kinda works.

It’s when they are at the end of the forest that Bohn sees Duen laughing and having fun with his friends, he didn’t even notice he was gone just as he predicted.

Mek follows his eyes and then turns his body completely to surround him on his embrace.

He thought that since he decided that he was breaking up with him that would hurt him less. 

He was wrong.

“It’s going to be okay.” Mek whispered. Bohn nodded. That’s what he wanted to believe. What he needed to believe.

Bohn can see the moment the rest of his friends see the reason of Mek’s hug.

Tee pulls Mek away and tugs him into his arms making Mek almost fall into Boss’arms. 

“If we need to defend you, say the word. “ Bohn patted his friend’s back.

“That goes for all of us.” Boss chimes in his finger circling his friends, his squad.

Now Bohn wants to cry for another reason.

He has great friends. The best.

“I know.” 

Just as he anticipated, Duen basically ignored him during the trip and he spent it having fun with his friends, trying to get rid of the weight he felt on his chest, of the nerves for what he was going to do and the sadness for letting the beautiful feeling go. 

It was almost like he was in mourning which was a bit ridiculous.

On the bus trip back, he sat next to Tee, who tried to cheer him up in every way possible, succeeding most of the time.

Now seeing all of his friends with the people they like gave him hope.

When they arrive at Bangkok, Bohn slowly approaches Duen, he tries to get his attention tapping on his shoulder.

Duen turns with a wide smile that loses a bit of that brightness when Duen realises it is him. He ignores it.

“Bohn.” Duen simply says. 

“Duen, can we talk? “ He points to a nearby bench, he can already feel the anxiety and the fear coming from Duen.

Is he really so scary?

They sit on the bench, Bohn stops the desire to sit close to him seating between the air and the bench. He needs the distance.

“ I want to break up.” He explains as calmly and as slowly on his enunciation as he can.

Instead of the reaction he was waiting for, Duen turns sharply to him frowning.

“What!” He screams.

“I want to break up. I don’t want us to be together anymore.” Bohn repeated, trying not to lose his nerve or his patience.

Duen’s face is a poem with so many expressions on it.

“Why? It doesn’t make sense. You asked me to move in with you just last week. Where is this coming from?” 

“ Because like you just said I asked you to move in and that’s not a normal thing to ask to someone you have barely known for a month. I did it because you make me insecure of everything so I push and push for something I’ve been denying myself is not there and I just don’t want to do that anymore. I haven’t been myself and I hate it. “

“So you’re saying I made you hate yourself?” 

Bohn shakes his head. Of course, this is getting out of proportion.

“I did that myself. I just don’t want to see you anymore. You hurt me unknowingly or not and I don’t want to feel like that, so please understand.“ 

“I don’t understand it, Bohn. How did I hurt you?” Duen looks more perplexed than anything.

Bohn runs a hand through his hair and takes a deep breath.

“I don’t know if it is because is me or is it you but if you are dating someone that means that you care for them, you show them affection whether that is physical, words or both. I think depends on the person but you haven’t shown me any of that. I tried and I tried so hard to show my affection for you, Duen. It has always seemed like you never wanted it. So what am I supposed to think? I sincerely hope that you find someone that you can care for and that cares for you in the way you want it. It’s just not me. See you, Duen. “ Feeling like there is nothing else to talk about Bohn gets up and leads himself to where he parked his car.

He thinks about how he is going to explain to his cousin that he can’t play with Duen’s little sister anymore at his apartment.

After he takes a shower he receives a message from his friends asking him to come have a drink.

He smiles. He is going to be okay.

**Author's Note:**

> If you want to talk about Thai engineers I'm samgreenstorm on tumblr.  
> Thank you for reading ^^.


End file.
